Sunday 27 July 2014

Mary M. Purdy Compassionate Evolution:  PLAY A COPING SKILL FOR OUR LIVESGermany in Nove...

Mary M. Purdy Compassionate Evolution:  PLAY A COPING SKILL FOR OUR LIVES
Germany in Nove...
:   PLAY A COPING SKILL FOR OUR LIVES Germany in November Archan's Mom and I I love the word 'play' and I am afraid of it...


 PLAY A COPING SKILL FOR OUR LIVES

Germany in November Archan's Mom and I
I love the word 'play' and I am afraid of it, I think. First why I am afraid, well I think it is because I have this belief that 'play' is for children only, it is a waste of time, don't know how to play as an adult so would I look silly. Why do I love the word 'play',well I was remembering this morning what I loved to do as a child, how I loved using my imagination and living my life there for periods of time. A memory just came to me, from a time when I was babysitting our two granddaughters in Digby. There was a hill very close to their home, it was summer time, and I imagined coasting down that hill. I found a crazy carpet and the three of us went coasting, what fun. I am sure some people would think that odd, coasting in the summer and at my age (about 9 years ago). I love to 'play' I was talking with Greg at the Chatterbox Cafe in Pugwash about spending time with grandchildren and how our way of being changes, we allow ourselves to play, and actually it feels natural.

 Martha Beck talks a lot about play, I am reading her book " Finding Your Way in a Wild New World, Reclaim Your True Nature to Create the Life You Want" and she says ".....the way to cope with the increasing complexity of the wild new world is to play more." Martha Beck also talks about "deep play" which involves mastering something difficult. She goes on "Real play is actually a wildly creative application of deep practice. It means picking something hard and doing it at a level that's almost too difficult."

Neuroscientists have found that this "edge of impossibilty" is where the brain produces its maximum doses of feel-good hormones like dopamine." Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi calls it "flow", Ellen Langer calls it "mindfulness". I like how Martha Beck says we must learn to play like we mean it. I really enjoyed as a child the difficult challenge of taming a wild barn cat, a scared race horse, I would learn the sounds the animal made and watch intensely it's body language with my whole body and mind. I would succeed in befriending it and feel so good about it (feel-good hormones). I would feel connected with everything for a period of time.

 I do want to play more, and bring this concept of play into my whole life not just brief periods of time. See what I am doing presently or something that is difficult I want to do as a time of deep play, I find that there is not an attachment to the outcome, pressure is not there, I like this human quality of 'play'. I hope you too will play more, love to all.

Monday 21 July 2014

Mary M. Purdy Compassionate Evolution:  My Teacher, Sam  Archan and I were at our family...

Mary M. Purdy Compassionate Evolution:  My Teacher, Sam
 Archan and I were at our family...
:  My Teacher, Sam  Archan and I were at our family lake lot with wonderful friends, yesterday. They enjoyed swimming, kayaking, I sat on s...
 My Teacher, Sam

 Archan and I were at our family lake lot with wonderful friends, yesterday. They enjoyed swimming, kayaking, I sat on shore afraid to get in the water in case the movement would cause me more pain. I fell off a horse two years ago and the recovery has been long and slow. I had kayaked a short distance the day before and was sore, so thought it best to give the body more time to recover. In a lot of circumstances that is a wise option, to allow time to recover.

I had a conversation with our friend's son, Sam, and something he said made me sit up more straight and listen more with all my senses, with my whole body.

“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.”
Albert Einstein
I

I have experienced  that if I pay attention with the intention to be open to what is being said, shown, I will learn what I need at the time. Sam just completed his first year in university, studying engineering, I asked him why engineering, he said "because I want to challenge myself". Imagine saying I want to challenge myself. What would I do if I wanted to challenge myself? WOW!!! I love this question, when I ask it I feel myself sit straighter, there is a feeling of alertness, curiosity, confidence, I want to look at what would challenge me, not always go for the safe route.

“It's daring to be curious about the unknown, to dream big dreams, to live outside prescribed boxes, to take risks, and above all, daring to investigate the way we live until we discover the deepest treasured purpose of why we are here.”
Luci Swindoll,
I Married Adventure


Today I biked to the lake for the first time this summer, I went in swimming, I want to challenge myself, not stand on the shore and watch my life go by, I am going to say "YES" to the challenge/s that I am facing. I will do some very gentle movement tomorrow so the body can recover. What I learned from Sam, I will use in all aspects of my life, I am smiling as I am writing, my heart is contented, mind focused lesson from the teacher is being assimilated. I had a feeling when talking with Sam that he says "YES" a lot in his life. Thank you, Sam I am very grateful that you came with your parents and shared part of your life journey with me, you gave me something I needed to hear. Love to All

Saturday 19 July 2014

Mary M. Purdy Compassionate Evolution:  Getting to Know Me, For Better or Worse, in Sick...

Mary M. Purdy Compassionate Evolution:
 Getting to Know Me, For Better or Worse, in Sick...
:   Getting to Know Me, For Better or Worse, in Sickness and Health....... I am still working very hard to learn about me, and from d...



  Getting to Know Me, For Better or Worse, in Sickness and Health.......




I am still working very hard to learn about me, and from doing this I am seeing more clearly the obstacles to my own happiness, good health and healthy relationships. In all my experiences in life I am the one constant.
 To do this research on me, I have to be  the scientist and lab rat at the same time. This is the most important work I have to do and the most challenging. What has been my most important step in this process..... setting the intention and paying attention, in other words practicing mindfulness. If there is no motivation there is no action, my motivation comes from wanting to create a kinder world, and that starts with me being kinder to myself and understanding me, and the obstacles that keep me from being kind to myself. The obstacles are the old habits, patterns and stories I tell myself, and in order to be aware of them I practice being mindful to what is going on in my inner world...not an easy practice, but the results are MOST certainly worth it.



“If we hope to go anywhere or develop ourselves in any way, we can only step from where we are standing. If we don't really know where we are standing... We may only go in circles...”
Jon Kabat-Zinn, Wherever You Go, There You Are: Mindfulness Meditation in Everyday Life 

  
I can be so unkind to myself, say things I would not say to someone else, like "come on you have no reason to be tired, get at it", "you will NEVER be good enough, know enough, just give up", "___________ doesn't like you, so just go away", "what good is your life, you waste so much time", "other people know better than you, you don't know what you want", on and on. This kind of internal dialogue keeps me stuck, inhibits personal growth, creates stress which causes inflammation, poor health over time and a sense of not being all right in the world, a feeling of sadness, loneliness, fear, and energy draining.As I get to know myself, my inner world better, more familiar which is what meditation, the practice of mindfulness does, allowing me to be more familiar with what is happening. When I notice I am caught in these old patterns, this is a mindful moment and this is where I can pause and change what is happening internally. What are the things you say to yourself that have become habitual over the years, that hold you prisoner? What practices do you do that help with these old stories?

Sharing our life journey with each other helps us feel not so alone, that it is not just me, that this is a journey we are all struggling in, together.

Love to all

Wednesday 16 July 2014

Mary M. Purdy Compassionate Evolution: Gratitude Shower Just got back from a wonderful w...

Mary M. Purdy Compassionate Evolution: Gratitude Shower
Just got back from a wonderful w...
: Gratitude Shower Just got back from a wonderful walk in the rain . , with Archan. I love a warm soft rain , cleansing, soothing, refr...


Gratitude Shower

Just got back from a wonderful walk in the rain., with Archan. I love a warm soft rain, cleansing, soothing, refreshing and great for the garden. There is a couple of birds singing, it sounds to me like a song of gratitude for the rain, I think it brings the worms to the surface. The  regular expression of gratitude supports the cultivation of compassion....why? When I feel grateful for the rain and the amount we receive, I think of countries, even provinces in our own country that need rain, I feel compassion for the people, animals, the earth that need rain. Now what, is there anything I can do about the suffering of those who need rain/water, well I can write about it, I can have conversations with people about the suffering of others, there is always something I can do, I can say a prayer, not in the usual sense of prayer but a prayer from my heart to others, the earth...."May you receive what you need, May those of us that are creating global issues see our wrong doing and change,NOW." So, smile and be grateful, feel a softening in your chest, in the area of your heart, and do this while tipping your face up to the rain, like a child would, stick out your tongue and catch a rain drop or two. Let the energy of warmth and care spread out from your heart into the world. This feels so very good, the smile, practice of gratitude, which makes us kinder to ourselves others and the world. I will share the healing power of smiling another time. love to all

Monday 14 July 2014

Mary Purdy Compassionate Evolution:  NEW BEGINNINGS How exciting, starting a new Blo...

Mary Purdy Compassionate Evolution:  NEW BEGINNINGS

How exciting, starting a new Blo...
:  NEW BEGINNINGS How exciting, starting a new Blog, a new beginning. I like that I can always begin again. Screwed up, begin again. ...

 NEW BEGINNINGS


How exciting, starting a new Blog, a new beginning. I like that I can always begin again. Screwed up, begin again. I don't have to stay in my old ways, patterns, habits if they don't serve me, others and the world. I can change, grow, science confirms this, I can change my brain...great news. So, I want to think and write about new beginnings, evolving, imagining my future and moving into it. I am in the designing part of a sculpture, it is about shedding old skin, just like a snake sheds its skin, I am shedding my old stories, patterns, habits, a compassionate evolution. I will be kind, caring as I shed, slip ups will be held in deep kindness as I begin again. I am so very fortunate to have a supporting partner and friends that I share my visualizations of my future with, so they too can coach, encourage me with deep kindness and compassion. I look forward to having you, the reader travel with me into the future.